Tuesday, March 25, 2014

What DNFs mean to me



The things I remember most about the Sahara Jordan 2014 were (in descending order of importance):-
1. The pain, the injuries and the management of them
2. The beautiful spectrum of colours in the deserts
3. The massive beautiful rock canyons and formations
4. The so many inspirational conversations I had with participants and the love


From observing myself and others on the trail, seems people including myself drop out of a race for a variety of reasons including just bad days, illness, injuries or perhaps reasons we don't even understand. I was reading from www.irunfar.com and found quite a good comment,

"in ultrarunning the DNF is a much more typical part of the sport than in shorter distances. Doing any one thing (save sleeping) for six-plus hours is generally quite difficult and unusual. When that thing is something as strenuous as running as fast as you can for that time, it only makes sense that so many of the more strenuous ultras have finishing rates in the 50-80% range."

Given the long hours of ultras, seems only naturally to have different learning every time and things never go as planned. The only thing you can do is to adapt and accept.

For Sahara Jordan, I went into the race with the usual mindset that however it played out, I would be happy. And my wish was granted. I didn't get a medal. But I had done 220k and had 7 really happy days.



I would remember Stage 5 for a long long time. I had never struggled with injuries so badly in my life. It never occurred to me in the morning that I should consider withdrawing. After limping down steep loose rocks for an hour, I realized I would not be able to go back up again. But the canyon seemed never ending and every step I was in excruciating pain. Six hours later I came out of the canyon and managed to push for another 6 hours miraculously.  

What was happening in my mind at the 220k mark still seems to me to be quite puzzling. It was 10 pm, Stage 5. I was unusually calm and decided to throw in the towel. I was not exactly sure what questions were going on in my head - was it love? Was it self-preservation? Was I doing more damage than good if I continue on? Should I continue to push ahead?

But very soon, the very calm self in me took over. I felt very contented to stop. It was good enough...


Some people choose to push through virtually anything and finish every race they start, no matter how ugly it gets, while others tend to drop more often than not when things start to go really bad. Maybe there is no such thing as one choice wiser than the other. They simply are different perspectives and different thought processes.

I never seem to understand why on certain days I could keep going consciously or sometimes unconsciously. Other days it just makes sense to stop. I guess this unpredictability is also one of the most fascinating things I like about ultras. Without the mystery and confusion it would all be quite boring.




 "We shall not fail or falter; we shall not weaken or tire...Give us the tools and we will finish the job."
Sir Winston Churchill, BBC radio broadcast, Feb 9, 1941

 Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could. Some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in, forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day, you shall begin it well and serenely...
Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)

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